by Real Business - Thursday, 30th August 2007

It was great returning to the Premiership but not when we moved to our new stadium. The old atmosphere was missing and my new seat couldn’t see a scoreboard. Some people wonder why anyone needs a big board to know the score, but as well as the goals, it shows the time left to the final whistle.

Irritated, I wrote to the City chairman, who promised to investigate my problem. Nothing happened, so I wrote again and was assured a new scoreboard would be considered at board level.

When nothing appeared next season, I wrote again, enclosing a £25 cheque payable to the Manchester City Scoreboard Fund. That got an immediate response. Their commercial manager called, praised my initiative, and asked for sponsorship towards their community youth programme. “I want a bloody scoreboard,” I replied.

Last July I bought one, a digital screen with “Timpson” written below in 4ft letters. My scoreboard inspired a sparkling start to the season, and after three games we led the Premiership. But it didn’t last. By Christmas, we were a mid-table team usually shown on Match of the Day after midnight.

When West Ham won our FA Cup quarterfinal, fans expressed their frustration on GMR Radio with cutting criticism: “What a load of rubbish. We should be knocking on the door of Europe, but lack quality all over the park.” “We must go in with all guns blazing, show more aggression and let the opposition know they are in a game.” “We should take each match by the scruff of the neck with all the team playing for the shirt, but it just doesn’t happen. That’s City all over.” Judging by Chelsea’s success, it all comes down to money. So I looked at City’s accounts. Turnover £62m, wages £38m, loss £16m, debts £96m – no wonder the directors weren’t interested in my scoreboard.

I don’t want to be a football director, but like callers to GMR, enjoy being an armchair critic. I have some ideas that could solve City’s financial problems. To wipe off the overdraft, the club must sell assets, and that means selling players. Give Stuart Pearce a dream deal, 20 per cent of all the cash he can create. Make him grow young players and sell them at a profit – selling a mature asset like Joey Barton for £10m is good business.

Pearce is probably the only manager in the Premiership with the tact and diplomacy needed to be nice to Jose Mourinho, who, with Russian cash and a liking for expensive players, is our best potential customer.

To solve the wage problem introduce payment by results. My scheme is simple: cut basic wages by 80 per cent, so Joey Barton earns £4,000 a week instead of £20,000, but give him the opportunity to earn an enormous bonus. For every home game the players share 10 per cent of the gate money, plus a further 20 per cent if they win or 10 per cent for a draw. (For away games the percentage applies to takings at the next home match.) Players not selected get no bonus, slashing the wage bill and encouraging disgruntled players to apply for a transfer which may, in turn, improve cash flow.

The idea is based on our branch bonus scheme. In each of 565 Timpson shops, the week’s wages bill is multiplied by 4.5 to set the target turnover.

Fifteen per cent of sales over target are paid as bonus. With the bonus unlimited, everyone is keen to increase sales, and with payments shared by everyone at work there is incentive to keep staff levels down.

If my scheme helps City, why stop there? It could cut our biggest extravagance: government expenditure. I would start it in the DTI, a department where savings are assured. The rules are simple. Twenty per cent of all cost savings during 12 months will be distributed to everyone still working in the department at the year-end, in proportion to their salary. Suddenly mandarins will start thinking about cutting the wage bill instead of recruiting another diversity co-ordinator.

I put my ideas to a politically aware pal. “It won’t work,” he said. “Loads of people will be out of a job, increasing the cost of unemployment benefit. Anyway, it’s designed for cobblers. You can’t create commercial common sense in the public sector.” Cobblers indeed. So the outlook for the next year is clear. More government inefficiency, higher taxes and Chelsea to win the Premiership.

John Timpson is chief executive of Timpson. His new book, Cobbled Together, is out now. For a copy, call Geraldine on 0207 368 7208.

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