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Business Focus >>

The new manufacturers The new manufacturers

A great British renaissance has been taking place. From Aberdeen to the West Country, the zing is back in manufacturing. It’s about time this spectacular story was told.

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Warning: My business is protected with chicken poo

by Kate Pritchard - Wednesday, 5th March 2008 - - Business comment

Warning: My business is protected with chicken poo

Try and break into Joe Weston-Webb’s flooring firm at your own peril.

Following an arson attack at his Nottinghamshire-based premises in February, which wreaked £2,000 worth of damage, the 70-year-old entrepreneur decided he wouldn’t get mad, he’d get even.

The founder of Grumpy Joe’s Flooring laid a set of booby traps for unsuspecting intruders, including a 30ft catapult loaded with chicken droppings, a human-sized catapult (a remnant from Weston-Webb’s former career as a travelling showman) and an exploding coffin (which only actually activates if you happen to climb into it).

He’s also erected a sign that’s bound to give impostors the heebie-jeebies: “Warning: These premises are protected by smart-poo and railway sleeper projectiles.”

Well, it sure beats CCTV cameras.

How do you fortify the defences of your business? Post your comments here.

BUSINESS NEWS >>

Senior care franchise fills gap in market

By Catherine Woods - October 10, 2008 3:21pm GMT

Trevor Brocklebank and his wife, Sam, bought the UK franchise for alternative care business Home Instead Senior Care after struggling to find appropriate services for his ailing grandfather.

Stop press: Sir Alan Sugar's bought into Woolies

By Rebecca Burn-Callander - October 10, 2008 2:36pm GMT

Amstrad founder and Apprentice star Sir Alan Sugar today acquired a four per cent stake in the ailing Woolworths chain.

Testing is crucial for new social networking site

By Catherine Woods - October 10, 2008 12:34pm GMT

Social networking site Wigadoo.com wants to make it easier for friends to organise social events when there’s money involved – from holidays to hen parties.

Does the Lightning car have electric appeal?

By Kate Pritchard - October 10, 2008 11:46am GMT

It scorches from 0-60mph in less than four seconds, its batteries can be charged in ten minutes and you can imagine James Bond sitting behind the wheel. But will the über-stylish electric Lightning car ever make money?

The financial market today

By Rebecca Burn-Callander - October 10, 2008 10:47am GMT

Share prices tumble further. Brown calls for global support for failing banks. And Pesto thinks its only going to get worse.

Brochures on Saving and investing

BUSINESS COMMENT >>

Playing monopoly with Alistair Darling

By Rebecca Burn-Callander - October 10, 2008 5:11pm GMT

It's Friday afternoon and RB's eyes are bleeding from frantically watching the rise and tumble of the financial markets today. To give our peepers, and yours, a well deserved break from doom and gloom, check out today's funnies from NewsBiscuit.

Market crisis: the Real Business bargepole ten

By Stuart Rock - October 10, 2008 1:53pm GMT

The market crisis has some big losers.

Global financial crisis: what next?

By Catherine Woods - October 09, 2008 11:31am GMT

I received a text from an investment banker friend this morning who, it has to be said, is master of the understatement.

Interest rates: the reaction

By Catherine Woods - October 08, 2008 4:03pm GMT

Was today’s global interest rates cut “one of the big, pivotal moments for the economy”?

Why I love being British...

By Rebecca Burn-Callander - October 08, 2008 2:01pm GMT

The financial markets are in turmoil. It's the worst banking crisis since the 1930's. A cloud of doom hangs over our fair nation. But some people still have the balls to have a little joke about it all.

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